Business runs at the velocity of trust. When trust falls apart, business activity comes to a shutdown. Agreements collapse. Work stops. Conversations cease. You may feel as though you’re losing a priceless business relationship. However, it is often possible to repair a damaged relationship. It is not easy; it takes time and requires a strategy.
Most people think that conflicts end partnerships. This is not always the case because relationships that survive a conflict can be the most rewarding. You both know how to weather the storm. You both learn to appreciate the priorities of the other.
When dealing with engagement in business, this guide will allow you to regain a lost relationship and help you know how to repair a broken business relationship. We will also try to understand complex frameworks instead of offering unusual recommendations.
1. Take Responsibility for the Issue Right Away
The relationship killer is to point fingers. The relationship-restorer is to take accountability. You need to examine your own behavior first. Did you fail to complete a task on time? Did you overcommit? Did you lose your temper during a call?
Apologies are often one-sided. Don’t fall into that trap. Be a business leader. Take the initiative to own your mistake. This takes the other person off the offensive and allows you to speak freely.
When you apologize, be straightforward and do not offer elaborate justifications. Avoid saying “I apologize but…” Just recognize that you are the cause of the issue, and explain that you understand the problem it created. This indicates that you value the other person’s problem and your understanding of it.
Taking ownership is the foundation of trust, and it also reflects how effective leaders understand how to hold people accountable without damaging professional relationships.
2. Figure Out the Real Reason for the Break
I realized that surface issues are the least of my worries when I had to deal with an irate client. For example, one client was mad because the reports were late. I thought that the problems were of a temporal nature. However, there was an issue deeper than the timelines. She was a middle manager. Her boss was probably on her case about the missing reports, and I was risking her position. Maybe my ignorance was costing her a paycheck and possibly her job.
Conflict resolution requires that you investigate. A good relationship is a closed case, and the missing link is the cause of the break. In order to do this successfully, it is important to identify the ‘real problem’ by breaking it down even further to the base and determining the center of the problem.
The technique is to ask ‘open questions’ that will allow the other party to elaborate. In this case, it is best to listen more rather than dominate the conversation. Should they be angry, allow them to be angry. Part of this process is for them to express their anger, and that is completely fine. People simply want to express their frustrations, and that is a natural feeling.
3. The “Reset Button” Meeting
Emails are not a good way to resolve conflicts. Text messages are even worse. Without the sound of someone’s voice or the expressions on their face, misunderstanding is the only thing that can happen.
You need to have a meeting. If you can’t meet in person, you need to do a video call. A phone call is the absolute bare minimum. You need to start from a human place. Schedule a meeting dedicated to the relationship. Name it a “reset meeting.”
Keep it on the agenda. Tell them you intend to clear the issues and move on. Go into it with the mindset that you are committed to their success. Remind them of the good work that you have done in the past. This creates a good atmosphere. It reminds you both why the relationship is important.
4. Achieving a “Good Faith” Victory
While words can be seen as empty, actions can yield a positive outcome. After providing an apology and doing some talking, you must do a quick win. Do something that immediately gives them an advantage. This is a “good faith” gesture.
This does not mean working for free. It means going the extra mile on the next task. You can complete a project two days before the deadline. You can go ahead and solve a minor issue that they didn’t even ask you to fix. You can send a valuable resource related to the field.
This will signal a change. They will see you actually doing something and not just talking. It will send a clear message to them about your commitment to the cause. In the long run, a series of minor accomplishments will significantly outweigh the negative memory loss.
5. Redefine the Rules of Engagement
Conflict in relationships can stem from unclear expectations. You had one expectation, and they had another. Neither was right nor wrong. However, you did not align. Now, you must set new expectations. Set aside a time to discuss how you will work together and be explicit.
- How frequently will you touch base?
- What is the ideal way to provide each other constructive criticism?
Document these, making sure you both agree to everything. This document becomes your safety net. It will prevent these fights from recurring. It demonstrates you are committed to improving the process, not just the attitude.
6. Practice Radical Consistency
Starting over takes a lot of work. Think of trust as a bucket. When you take a break, the trust bucket is empty, and to refill it, it has to be done consistently. You need to be boringly consistent.
Trust is built in drops and lost in buckets. After a break, the trust bucket is empty. Refilling it can only be done through consistency and being boringly reliable.
If you will call at 2, don’t call at 2:05. If you promise a draft by Friday, don’t send it Friday evening. Every little promise matters. Keep yours if you want to be the most dependable and consistent. If you slip, you will need to be the most reliable to make up for it. They will stop waiting for you to fail. Trust will come back, and the worry will end.
Consistency, ownership, and empathy are qualities that clearly define what constitutes a great leader, especially during conflict resolution.
7. Set Boundaries
This is the most difficult approach. There are moments when relationships cannot be repaired (and in some cases, it is better for the parties involved not to repair them). The relationship may be harmful to both parties. An unfit client or partner may be a negative influence on other aspects of your business.
You must recognize your boundaries. If you have exhausted all options and they are still uncooperative, it may be best to exit the relationship. It is best to end the relationship if they are lying or not trustworthy. Safeguarding your business and your mental well-being is the top priority.
It is not a failure to end a relationship. In fact, it is a positive signal that you know your worth. It can be done in a way that is respectful to both parties. You can complete your outstanding obligations to the other party and then move on to better deals. It is arguably better not to have a deal than to have a bad deal.
